How to Craft and Implement Positive Affirmations that WORK

self care-self love

*Image by the lovely Meri Daugherty

The words we wield have incredible power.  

Our capacity for language shapes our thoughts and our entire realm of thinking.  They evoke our emotions, craft our perspective, and process our experience.  Our words have the power to shape our reality. Yet, how often do you take stock on the language you’re using?  How often do you evaluate if it’s actually serving you?

Just like you clean your closet of clothes that no longer fit, it’s important to do regular cleaning of your mindsets.  Does this narrative fit you anymore?  Does it bring you delight when you wear it?  Is it representative of the woman you are now?  Or maybe it’s looking shabby, has holes, and you’ve worn it since the 9th grade.

As you continue to clean out your thought wardrobe, it’s also important to be intentional about what you allow inside.  What will you allow to enter the sacred ground of your mind?

Enter the power of affirmations.

In the world of coaching, affirmations are a favorite tool.  I love to prescribe my clients affirmations and mantras as nourishing food for the mind.  If we take the time and care to nourish our bodies with wholesome healthy foods, I believe that we should give the same consideration to our minds!

Affirmations truly have the power to completely change your life.  But only if you know how to use them properly.

The difference between affirmations that have the power to radically change your life versus limp, lifeless affirmations that make you want to puke in your mouth is one thing: the affirmations that work access your subconscious mind.

The Power of Your Subconscious Mind

Your subconscious mind is in the driver’s seat of your behavior.  It doesn’t matter how much you say you want something (love, money, happiness, success), if your subconscious mind isn’t on board, you’re not going anywhere.

Why?  Because your subconscious mind is here to keep you safe.  Our conscious mind lives in our prefrontal cortex where we have the capacity for logical thought and critical thinking.  But our subconscious mind lives in our amygdala.  This is the reptilian, primitive part of our brain with one goal in mind: survival.  The reptilian brain is the part that engages fight, flight, or freeze when you’re faced with a stressful situation.

If your subconscious mind believes that…

  • it’s not safe for you to be loved because that means you’ll be vulnerable, exposed, and then rejected

  • it’s not safe for you to be successful at the level you desire because you’ll be attacked

  • it’s not safe for you to receive money in the amounts you desire because money is the root of all evil

then you’re not going to allow your soulmate into your life, get that promotion, or make that sale.Because your subconscious believes that it’s not safe for you to have what you want.  You’re going to continually self-sabotage to prevent yourself from receiving your desires as a means of self-preservation.

I know it seems backwards.  But that’s exactly the reason that no matter how hard you “fight” for what you want, the needle doesn’t seem to move.  It’s because your subconscious mind believes it’s protecting you.

The only way to flip the switch on this is to rewire your subconscious mind.  You tell it that it’s safe for you to be loved, rich, successful, happy, and well, YOU in this world.  And affirmations are one powerful tool to get started.

Using Affirmations to Rewire Your Subconscious

While the conscious mind communicates with words, your subconscious mind has no capacity for language.  Instead, it communicates via emotions, images, and body language.  Therefore, it’s vital to engage all three of these methods of communication when you say your affirmations.

Step 1 | Select Affirmations that RESONATE

Selecting an affirmation that truly resonates with you is key.  If saying “I’m awesome” or “I’m rich” doesn’t liven you up, find something that does.  This will help activate the emotion and imagery attached to the statement. Choose an affirmation that makes your heart leap, speaks straight to your soul, and awakens an inner truth that you’ve been longing to remember.

Some of my personal favorites right now are:

  • I am safe.  I am loved.  I am whole.

  • It is safe, liberating, and freeing to show up in the world as me

  • Money flows to me in fun and unexpected ways 

  • I love my body and my body loves me.  We work in tandem with each other in every moment.

  • It is easy, safe, and fun for me to receive my desires 

Even more than selecting a single affirmation, collect a few as your staples around a single growth edge.  I recommend my clients work on no more than 2-3 areas of growth at a time (ex. body, money, visibility, love, etc.).  For example, if you’re developing a more loving, positive relationship with your body, write out three body positive affirmations that really speak to you.

  • My body is a temple to the divine, and I treat it with exquisite care

  • It is easy, fun, and instantly rewarding to care for and love my body

  • I am strong, flexible, and in the best shape of my life

These are the new statements that shape your reality.


Step 2 | Activate Your Subconscious

Once you have these affirmations selected, it’s important to not just say them passively.  But to actively engage with them on all levels of your subconscious – imagery, emotion, and body.  

If you’re affirming that you treat your body with exquisite care, close your eyes and visualize what that would look like for you.  What do you feel, taste, smell, hear, and see?  Bring yourself into the energy of treating your body like a temple for the divine.

Then, emotionally engage with this visualization.  Deeply FEEL into the experience of fiercely loving your body with the highest respect, honor, and devotion.  Let these emotions fill your heart and lungs with every breath.  Feel the cells of your body light up with bright white, purple, and pink radiant light.

And finally, engage your body.  Roll your hips, hug yourself, run your hands along your beautiful curves, lift your hands in the air with joy.  Or if you’re affirming strength and power, stand in a position that makes you feel strong, powerful, and triumphant.  Align your body language with the statement and the emotions attached to it.

Do ALL of these while you say your affirmations aloud.  Speak them as your new truth as many times as you need to.  Let it be an immersive experience and ritual where you bathe yourself in truth.


Doing this practice once and then never picking it up again is like eating one vegetable and saying you’re good.  It’s vital to be ritualistic about your growth if you truly want to see deep transformation.

What I find to be the most helpful when developing a new habit is to attach it to a current part of your routine.  If you have a regular morning practice, include your affirmations in the experience.  Maybe you say them when you’re doing your make up, before or when you get in the shower, or right after your morning meditation.

Making these affirmations a regular practice and prayer to yourself is how you’ll see incredible results in every aspect of your life.

BONUS | Allow Yourself to Receive Support

As humans, we weren’t wired to go it alone.  That’s exactly the reason that your friend needs to talk out her problems with you.  When she’s in the thick of it, she’s too attached to the situation and “in it” to see the bigger patterns.  But from the outside, you can pick them up in an instant.  We’re designed to support each other and to receive support.

If you’re truly ready and craving more from yourself and your life, I highly recommend allowing yourself to receive support from a coach or mentor.  Whether that’s the Awakening membership, applying for a free 1:1 strategy session with me, or finally letting yourself work with that coach you’ve been dying to hire, receiving next level support is key to becoming the next level you.  If you’ve been waiting for “the right time”, this is your sign and reminder that the time to invest in yourself and your journey is NOW.


Author Bio:

Melanie St. Clair is a mindset and intuitive coach for visionary women on the rise. Through reconnecting with your Divine Feminine, transformative inner work, and aligning with your true self, Melanie helps you make more money, impact, and Goddess magic with ease and flow. When she’s not working with her rockstar clients, you can find her traveling the world (or to the grocery store) with her husband Jeramia, drinking matcha lattes, or hopelessly trying to get her cats to take selfies with her. You can learn more about her latest programs on her website and follow her on Instagram for daily inspiration.