All Birth Stories are Beautiful
*Image by Claire Corbin
For months and months we tried and hoped for a baby with no clear signs it was going to happen.
Finally, a long awaited positive test! The miracle of life started growing, and I could not have been more excited. I began planning right away. After coming from a family with a LOT of kids with a mom who had all “normal” deliveries (more than half of them all-natural with no medication), I decided that must be the route I was going to take.
Then some unfortunate news derailed my perfect plan: “your baby is healthy, but she’s in breech position. We’ll keep checking on her positioning in future appointments. She could still turn.” Visit after visit and my little peach still had no interest in the prospect of the birth canal. At 37 weeks, a final attempt to take back my natural delivery led me to an external cephalic version (basically two doctors pulled on my stomach with alarming pressure to try and maneuver my baby head down—it was about as much fun as it sounds).
Any guesses how that went? Yeah, it was unsuccessful, so a C-section was scheduled for 39 weeks, and I surrendered the possibility of that natural delivery I dreamt of.
Then she was here.
Somehow it didn’t matter that I had a sterile, precise delivery that was opposite of what I envisioned because I remembered that what I hoped and longed for was HER. Fast forward just over a year, and we found out another new blessing was on the way! This time around my pregnancy was a breeze (as much as pregnancy can be), my baby was cooperative and my doctor cleared me to try for a natural delivery before having to default to another C-section (also known as a VBAC).
Twenty-six LONG hours of labor and another beautiful girl joined our family. My labor was everything I thought I missed out on during my first delivery, but I didn’t feel the sense of victory I thought I would. Don’t get me wrong, it was an amazing experience, and I’m so grateful I was able to deliver naturally, but it led me to a lesson I hold so dear. Diving into why I didn’t feel an overwhelming sense of accomplishment, I learned something every woman should be reminded of. That is, the method in which you bring your babies into this world has no impact on their value or yours.
It seems like there’s this stigma attached to having a C-section that it’s somehow less amazing.
In reality, it’s incredible that we have another method available to get our babies here safely. To be frank, all births are messy, vulnerable and intimate. To call one labor more beautiful than another would devalue the human that came from it. If you’re a mom that went all natural and had your baby the old fashioned way (maybe even without medication), this isn’t meant to discredit how strong you are. You are incredible and it’s so beautiful that you tapped into your primal, raw instincts to bring your baby into this world and exude that strength.
If you’re a mom who got the epidural or other pain management aid: you are so brave for listening to your body and responding to its needs! Whether you made that decision prior to labor or during, it’s so powerful that you recognize when your body needs support and actively pursue it. If you’re a mom that had a planned or unplanned C-section: you didn’t choose the “easy way out.” You’re not any less of a mom because your baby was brought into the world surgically, and you aren’t any less beautiful or strong because of it. Regardless of the events that lead up to your baby coming into the world this way, you are amazing and fierce—you recovered from major surgery while caring for a newborn (and sometimes other kiddos too)!
No matter what your birthing experience was like, walk with your head held high.
Be empowered and know that you are brave, strong, powerful, and beautiful. Whatever method of introduction your baby got into this world, they are so blessed that you are their mom. Not because of HOW you delivered but because you DID. Your birth story is beautiful, girl. Please don’t be afraid to tell it!
Alise is a wife and work-at-home mom of two girls. In addition to being a busy mom, Alise is also passionate about health and wellness and uses her experience in team sports, customer service and leadership as a wellness coach. Her main initiative is to come alongside women as a source of encouragement and accountability on their journey. She’s an aspiring blogger, sister to a lot of people, and full time goof ball. She’s a self-proclaimed hot mess and finds great solidarity in connecting with other women owning their mess and embracing their weirdness.