A Mom’s Note to Her Daughter: 7 Truths You Need to Know TODAY
I think a lot about the type of woman I want my daughter to grow up to be.
And truthfully, a lot of that depends on the type of women she sees. Reflecting back, my mom showed me strength, courage, and servant leadership simply by being herself. Sure, she taught me about science, how to dress, what to say in conversation, but the most important lessons of all, she lived out right in front of me.
When I learned I’d have a daughter, something shifted. I became her number one role model, not just a person living in the world. What I do, she does. The End. So, with the progress of the #MeToo and #TimesUp movements, I want to be intentional about the lessons I not only teach, but live out for my daughter. When I think of what I’d like my daughter to know, I think about the me she needs to see and the amazing parts of being a woman she needs to know.
Here are seven truths YOU need to know today:
1| You are powerful
Somewhere along the way, a dirty lie was whispered that said women have no power. That they are less than. And hear me now, nothing could be further from the truth. Even in biblical times, women had stealth power that made all the difference. Women hold the power of creation, the power of knowledge and wisdom, the power of intuition. Perhaps the power we hold has been diminished through time because it is, in fact, so powerful it is intimidating. But no matter what anyone says, you hold all of the power and more. Live and walk and make your choices in that power. No one can take it away from you but yourself.
2| You have a voice, but it doesn’t always have to be the loudest
I often wonder about the loudest voices in the room. Would their message be better received if they took it down a notch? You have a voice, and it can be as quiet or as loud as you want. Be careful with the volume, however. Just because you’re loud doesn’t make you worth listening to. Sometimes a quiet word spoken in kindness causes more change than the one yelling. Never mistake being quiet or kind for weakness, but in being kind, do not let people walk over you. Stand up and speak your mind, in whatever volume you decide.
3| You don’t always need to be a general where a foot solider is needed
Not every fight is yours to lead. Not every cause is for you to blaze paths. Some battles need foot soldiers more than generals. If you see a battle that lights you aflame, ask yourself, “Is my voice the right one to speak?” If so, go in, ready to lead the charge. If not, take a breath and find the person in charge. Let them give you orders and lead your way. If a battle is not yours to lead, you will make more of a difference lifting up the leadership than you will leading the way. And sometimes it may just be that you need to be led before you can lead.
4| You were made exactly like you are for a purpose bigger than you
The world isn’t all about you, but what you have to offer is vital to the world. Nothing life hands you is an accident or a mistake. You were made for a specific reason, and your whole life is an exercise in readying you for that purpose. Learn from your experiences and grow where you are. Lean in to the hard things and have the courage to face them. Your purpose is bigger than you, but courageously chasing after your purpose may change the world.
5| You were made to crush it
Do not be afraid to be great at something. To be the best at something. If everything you walk through is preparation for your purpose, then you SHOULD crush it. Do not dumb yourself down so that you won’t be intimidating. As Marianne Williamson said, “There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that others won’t feel insecure around you. We were meant to shine…and as we shine our light, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same.” You being your best gives others permission to do the same. Get to it!
6| A man is not your enemy, but he is also not your savior
I often hear young women saying things like “take men down where they belong” or “it’s woman’s time now”. Yes! Yes, it is beyond time for women to rise and seize what they were made to do without hinderance or fear. Please remember, however, that men, as a whole, are not the enemy. Some may think differently than you, some may even try to get in your way of success. MOVE ON. You have power. You have control. YOU WERE MADE FOR THIS.
On the other hand, men are also not your savior. Male colleagues or bosses are leadership, not a pawn to use. Marriage is for a helpmate, not a keeper. There is not a man in the world who can save you from a mess of your own making. That’s on you. Pull yourself up. Ask and accept help when you need it. But don’t expect the presence of a man to save you.
7| Your body is yours, no one else’s
No one is allowed to make you feel less-than without your permission. So, if someone says something about the way you look, that is only their opinion. The real questions is - how do you feel? If you want to change something, that’s in your control, but don’t ever let someone’s words take your power away from yourself. What someone else thinks about you is none of your business. Keep it that way.
It’s time to embrace yourself body, mind, and soul with OPEN arms. No more negative self-talk, body insecurity, and self-doubt. Download our FREE e-book, EMBRACE, and start taking action towards releasing the doubt and claiming your truth today.
April M. Payne is a born-and-bred Texan who lives outside of Houston with her cute husband, 2 hilarious kids, and pup, Mr Jones. She loves watching God come through for people in big ways, seeing women go for their dreams, and charcuterie plates around the world. She can be found reading a book most days and is on a perpetual hunt for the perfect white T.
Connect with April over on Instagram!